Negative self-talk about our bodies – especially as women – is common. The impact of these negative thoughts only fuels our challenges with food, eating, weight, and body image.
Know the Frequency
How often do you have a negative thought about your body?
Does your negative self-talk begin first thing in the morning when you look in the mirror?
Is it when you find yourself staring at the clothes in your closet?
Is it when you hold your breath as you step on the scale?
Youâre not alone.
Negative Self-Talk Is All Too Common
Ninety-seven percent of women have an âI hate my bodyâ moment every single day.
Weâre practically hard-wired by society and our experiences to be programmed for negative self-talk.
We have, on average, about 50,000 thoughts every single day and research tells us that about 80% of these are negative. As if that wasnât bad enough, as much as 90% of these negative thoughts are repeated day after day after day!
With this data, itâs no wonder we continue to struggle with ourselves, our food, our weight, and our bodies.
Taking It Further
With so much stacked against us, what are our options?
Is it worth exploring what you say to yourself about your body?
Itâs only through awareness that we can make different choices – better choices.
Pause for a moment and think back to this morning and most mornings.
What do you say to yourself when you first look in the mirror?
What are you thinking? Is it easy to find a flaw with yourself right away? Do you automatically bring judgment to the way you look first?
OrâŚ
Do you smile, say hello, and take a moment to be grateful to have another day to experience this life and make more memories?
Which way do you think better supports you to deal with lifeâs challenges?
Changing the Self-Talk
With raised awareness comes the opportunity to do something differently: to think something different and to practice different and more positive self-talk.
Letâs explore 3 quick steps for more positive self-talk to support you in feeling good about your body and yourself.
1. Practice Gratitude
One of the quickest ways to begin to feel good in your body is to start every day being grateful for at least one thing about your body.
Ready for some examples?
It could beâŚ
- The unique color of your eyes
- The strength of your legs
- Your manicured fingernails
- Your ability to hear the rain on the roof
- The smoothness of your skin
- The shape of your eyebrows.
Anything and everything counts here!
This can feel a little awkward at first since women arenât programmed to look kindly toward ourselves or to our bodies in fear that others will think weâre arrogant or narcissistic.
BUT, by starting the day noticing something that you like, or something you are grateful for about yourself, you set yourself up for seeing more beauty throughout the day ahead. Just as if you started your day judging yourself, feeling shame, anger or frustration with your body, you set yourself up to be more judgmental of others as the day progresses.
Why not be a rebel? Begin your day by noticing the wonder of your body and all that it can do: hug, walk, watch a sunrise, listen to music, taste a piece of chocolate, sit in an Adirondack chair, stand to admire a piece of artwork, pick something up off the floor, swing on a swing, or swim in the water.
By moving the focus away from what you cannot do and toward what you can do makes a big difference in the way you feel all day.
2. Wear Clothes that Fit and Feel Good
Another way to feel good in your body is to wear clothes that fit and feel good on your body!
So many women I know wake up every morning and stare into a closet of clothes that donât fit, and from there they begin to go into an internal negative dialogue with themselves. Feeling ashamed that they donât look like they âshould;â angry that they ate that second piece of pizza or didnât get to the gym; frustrated that those pants from five years ago donât fit anymore.
Does that sound like you?
I encourage you to clean out your closet and fill it with clothes that you feel good in.
How? Start by choosing colors, fabrics, and sizes that allow you to move and breathe.
You have the ability to choose to start every morning looking at a closet of clothes that make you smile (setting you up to smile more during your day) vs. looking at a closet day after day feeling bad about yourself, beating yourself up, or even full of shame and hatred of yourself.
As far as whatâs no longer working in your closet ⌠you can box some clothes up; bring them to a consignment shop; put them out of sight; or give them to a shelter for someone else who may need them to enjoy.
Wearing clothes that feel comfortable on your body is a great way to take care of yourself, an important self-care technique that can also help decrease stress and increase happiness.
3. Stop Comparing
Lastly, another way to help you feel good in your body is to let go of all sources of comparison.
Comparison of friends, family, social media feeds, cultural and societal norms, and even younger versions of yourself is not helpful.
Here are some easy ways to address this:
- Unsubscribe from social media feeds that make you feel âless thanâ or not âgood enough.â
- Seek out feeds that make you feel empowered and confident in how you look. Find and follow Shaping Perspectives!
- Notice when you begin to compare yourself to others. Remember that you are the only you. Only you have your unique genetics. Comparing yourself to another is like comparing apples to oranges.
- Start to appreciate your unique genetic type: tall, short, narrow hips, wide hips, voluptuous torso, thick thighs, small feet ⌠you get the idea! Embrace YOU!
Research tells us that comparing yourself to others will decrease your own self-confidence, self-esteem, self-worth, and overall body image. Feeling comfortable and appreciating the body that you have today can reduce stress, increase joy, and will lead to a life full of more confidence and happiness.
Better Results with Positive Self-Talk
Armed with more positive self-talk practices, weâre much more empowered to address our challenges with food, eating, weight, and body image. Loving self-talk is a step on the path to more joy, and itâs an integral component to all our programs at Shaping Perspectives.
What is one way you can begin to shift your own self-talk?  Sign up for a free 30 day membership to self-talk plus and begin to shift the way you think today!Â
For support and guidance to begin practicing more positive self-talk, sign up for a free clarity conversation…and don’t find yourself thinking the same things this time next year. Â Click here to schedule yours today.
